The following post is the second of several by my husband, Kenny. Thanks for reading! ~Alyson
Having a loved one that has CFS is like being ripped off. This disease affects everything. And when I say everything I mean “EVERYTHING”. The emotions that I have and the quality of life are not even close to that of what Alyson has to go through. The tears and isolation that she endures is something that I compassionately and sadly endure with her. But, that does not neglect the point that this disease has stolen a lot from our marriage.
It is not an isolated disease that just affects one person, but robs the whole family of life. We don’t get to go on walks, workout together, go to parks or other physical activities without major consequences. Instead of having Alyson crash and burn, we limit, almost to non-existent our activities. Weekends are for recovery from long weekdays.
Please, if you don’t have CFIDS and are thinking that you do the same, wake up! You choose to lie around on the weekends without any action. Alyson is forced by having no energy. Completely different, not even comparable, don’t even go there!
If you really want to test the strength of your love and your commitment towards your spouse, try having one with this disease. Alyson does her best to help out, go on dates, and do some chores along with anything else she can muster the energy for. Even with sacrifice, her life along with mine is being high jacked. Stolen are the basic enjoyments for couples to enjoy one another. Things that too many couples take for granted. Not truly enjoying that walk with your wife, or that weekend drive through the country? That is a shame. Unfortunately, we don’t get that privilege along with many others.
I am not looking for sympathy, but I am trying to express the seriousness of this life altering disease. It does not just smack one person in the face; this illness spits, steals, mocks and walks away leaving an entire family in a ditch looking for some help. When other loved ones don’t fully acknowledge this, they too are kicking dirt in the ditch. Please don’t bury family and friends that are suffering. Having this disease is isolating enough that they don’t need any added misery.